I found this story on the internet. I really like it and just had to share:
A man came home from work and found his three children outside, still in their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn all around the front yard. The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front door to the house and there was no sign of the dog. Proceeding into the entry, he found an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was wadded against one wall. In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a Cartoon channel, and the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing. In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the counter, the fridge door was open wide, dog food was spilled on the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door. He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she might be ill, or that something serious had happened. He was met with a small trickle of water as it made its way out the bathroom door. As he peered inside he found wet towels, scummy soap and more toys strewn over the floor. Miles of toilet paper lay in a heap and toothpaste had been smeared over the mirror and walls. As he rushed to the bedroom, he found his wife still curled up in the bed in her pajamas, reading a novel.She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went. He looked at her bewildered and asked, "What happened here today?"She again smiled and answered, "You know every day when you come home from work and you ask me what in the world I do all day?""Yes," was his incredulous reply.She answered, "Well, today I didn't do it."
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
Monday, March 3, 2008
The Ultra Metabolism Diet
I made a chocolate cake on Saturday night and had a big piece. I felt like it was Ms. Trunchbull's chocolate cake in my kitchen. It was one of those boxed chocolate cakes and I used chocolate frosting from a tub. It was delicious.
Well I am happy to announce that after Zach and I ate our one big piece, I scooped the whole chocolate cake into a dingy Wal*Mart bag, and double knotted it like a load of poopy diapers, and threw it into the trash! I know that I have never done anything like that in my life, and it felt really good.
We are sort of rethinking the way we have been eating lately. I have been listening to this book on tape called "Ultra Metabolism" by Paul Hyman." I have not gotten very far, but I am learning why it is important to eliminate any foods containing "super fats" or "super sugars." We are currently ridding our cupboard of anything with high fructose corn syrup, or hydrogenated soybean oil (for example).
Also, I have stopped consuming fake sweeteners. According to Dr. Hyman, these fake sugars make your body think something caloric is coming along, and so you create insuline. When no calories are found, (because the Coke Zero you just drank had none), you feel hungry (because of the insuline you created when you tasted something sweet), and your body starts to crave sugar! (or simple carbs- ie white bread/pasta). You make too much insuline and can become prediabetic! It makes so much sense!
Dr. Hyman says that the part of your brain that tells you that you need food is in the same area as the "fight or flight response." He says that if you let yourself get to the panic point (fight or flight) between you and a bagel- the bagel always wins. It's a survival mechinism.
This diet is a really strict one, and I will not be following it cold turkey (my excuse is that I am nursing). For now, I have just eliminated high fructose corn syrup (btw this is a main ingrediant in Light Yoplait Yogurt)! We have also stopped eating anything 3 hrs before bedtime. Dr. Hyman says that eating and then sleeping is the way Sumo wrestlers get to be 300-400 lbs!
In addition, we have purchased annual Zoo passes! We went for a while on Saturday, and I felt like I got a great workout just walking around for a couple hours. There are a lot of pretty steep hills, and the animals are all spread out, so I think this will be a really good way to lose weight. When I go to the mall to walk, I just don't get much exercise ("oooo look at this Chloe" or "Free samples at Cinnabon! Hot darn!"). When I weighed myself the day after the zoo, I had lost 1.5 lbs!
Hopefully this works for us.
Well I am happy to announce that after Zach and I ate our one big piece, I scooped the whole chocolate cake into a dingy Wal*Mart bag, and double knotted it like a load of poopy diapers, and threw it into the trash! I know that I have never done anything like that in my life, and it felt really good.
We are sort of rethinking the way we have been eating lately. I have been listening to this book on tape called "Ultra Metabolism" by Paul Hyman." I have not gotten very far, but I am learning why it is important to eliminate any foods containing "super fats" or "super sugars." We are currently ridding our cupboard of anything with high fructose corn syrup, or hydrogenated soybean oil (for example).
Also, I have stopped consuming fake sweeteners. According to Dr. Hyman, these fake sugars make your body think something caloric is coming along, and so you create insuline. When no calories are found, (because the Coke Zero you just drank had none), you feel hungry (because of the insuline you created when you tasted something sweet), and your body starts to crave sugar! (or simple carbs- ie white bread/pasta). You make too much insuline and can become prediabetic! It makes so much sense!
Dr. Hyman says that the part of your brain that tells you that you need food is in the same area as the "fight or flight response." He says that if you let yourself get to the panic point (fight or flight) between you and a bagel- the bagel always wins. It's a survival mechinism.
This diet is a really strict one, and I will not be following it cold turkey (my excuse is that I am nursing). For now, I have just eliminated high fructose corn syrup (btw this is a main ingrediant in Light Yoplait Yogurt)! We have also stopped eating anything 3 hrs before bedtime. Dr. Hyman says that eating and then sleeping is the way Sumo wrestlers get to be 300-400 lbs!
In addition, we have purchased annual Zoo passes! We went for a while on Saturday, and I felt like I got a great workout just walking around for a couple hours. There are a lot of pretty steep hills, and the animals are all spread out, so I think this will be a really good way to lose weight. When I go to the mall to walk, I just don't get much exercise ("oooo look at this Chloe" or "Free samples at Cinnabon! Hot darn!"). When I weighed myself the day after the zoo, I had lost 1.5 lbs!
Hopefully this works for us.
Friday, February 22, 2008
Chloe's Best Friend Kate
This is Chloe's best friend Kate. They like to fight over toys and grab at each others' faces. Kate and Chloe are about a month apart, but Kate is big for her age, and Chloe is small... and also Chloe was about 3 weeks early- so we consider the two to be about the same age.
Kate's mom's name is Krista, and she is my friend. We are having a good time getting to know each other and talking about babies and husbands and girly stuff. Chloe and I like having new friends.
Saturday, February 16, 2008
I Am My Own Grandpa
Zach and I have gotten in a lot of confusing discussion regarding first, second, third cousins and their removal. The discussion never goes anywhere. When I googled this, I found that a lot of people don't know. There are a lot of websites out there where people answer each others' questions, and it was really funny to see that everyones' answers varied so much. Here is a helpful chart I found. Hope it clarifies things for everyone.Friday, February 15, 2008
Russell Speeders Car Wash
Zachary decided to buy me a wonderful hour long massage for Valentine’s Day.
Zach dropped me off at the message therapist’s office and went to go get my car washed at Russell Speeders Car Wash (at about 114th and West Center road). This is a very funny car wash and I had told him he needed to try it out sometime. It reminds me of something from a Pee Wee Herman movie. There are manikins in the carwash. The manikins have human heads and stick figure bodies. They are wearing regular clothes, which cling to their metal frame bodies because it is sopping wet in the car wash. There is a black manikin with a whistle that holds a stop sign. This car wash is a sight to behold under the most normal of circumstances.
When Zachary picked me up after my message, I sat down and began to put on my seat belt. I noticed that my seat belt was very wet and asked why. Zach responded with a surprisingly snappish "I'M ALL WET!!"I looked up, and sure enough, Zachary was wet and furious. I was reminded of a puppy who had received a not wanted bath. I could not believe my luck, and felt like it was Christmas all over again. "WHAT HAPPENED?!" I exclaimed.
WELL, evidently, Zach had gone into the car wash (and here is where he angrily interjects that "there wasn't even a sign that said to put your car into neutral," though I know for a fact there is one). When he had gotten to the part where you are supposed to stop, he put his car into park, and a frantic car wash attendee ran over to him yelling to "PUT YOUR CAR IN NEUTRAL!!" Zachary rolled down his window and asked the attendant to repeat himself. "PUT YOUR CAR INTO NEUTRAL!!!!" the attendee screamed.
Zach acted quick and realized that having his car in park was probably causing damage to it at this point. Then he realized that the "ride" had begun and he started to roll up his window. It must have dawned on him at exactly that moment that he was in my car, and the driver’s side window most often gets stuck when it is rolled down. I can only imagine (with delight) what happened next. Zach proceeded to be washed, waxed, and whomped in the head with the car wash "whompers," all the while panicking and possibly screaming as he was pummeled, soaped, and squirted. He denies any screaming, or obscenities, but I like to imagine that there was much of that going on.
When he exited the car wash, another 'annoying' manikin was holding a sign that said to go when the light came on. Zach waited patiently. He was not going to make any move without being sure he was doing the right thing. He was mortified when (probably about 5 min later) he was forced to make a move as the car behind him started honking with fervor.I asked Zach "when did you finally get the window up," and he replied with bitterness, "about 10 blocks later."It is 20 degrees outside, he was wet, and he had to drive 10 blocks with the window down. Also, Chloe was with him in the car at the time (though... thankfully, she remained dry... and possibly slept through the entire adventure). Zach was late to work this afternoon because he had to wash the stick from his soapy and waxy body, and change his clothes. I know that in time Zach will be able to see the humor in this situation. He begged me not to tell anyone. I apologized and told him that the world MUST know of this.
I hope you enjoy this gift I have given you.
I will try to get some pictures of this car wash in the next week so you all can see how funny it is. All in all I think this was one of the better days I have had in my life.
Zach dropped me off at the message therapist’s office and went to go get my car washed at Russell Speeders Car Wash (at about 114th and West Center road). This is a very funny car wash and I had told him he needed to try it out sometime. It reminds me of something from a Pee Wee Herman movie. There are manikins in the carwash. The manikins have human heads and stick figure bodies. They are wearing regular clothes, which cling to their metal frame bodies because it is sopping wet in the car wash. There is a black manikin with a whistle that holds a stop sign. This car wash is a sight to behold under the most normal of circumstances.
When Zachary picked me up after my message, I sat down and began to put on my seat belt. I noticed that my seat belt was very wet and asked why. Zach responded with a surprisingly snappish "I'M ALL WET!!"I looked up, and sure enough, Zachary was wet and furious. I was reminded of a puppy who had received a not wanted bath. I could not believe my luck, and felt like it was Christmas all over again. "WHAT HAPPENED?!" I exclaimed.
WELL, evidently, Zach had gone into the car wash (and here is where he angrily interjects that "there wasn't even a sign that said to put your car into neutral," though I know for a fact there is one). When he had gotten to the part where you are supposed to stop, he put his car into park, and a frantic car wash attendee ran over to him yelling to "PUT YOUR CAR IN NEUTRAL!!" Zachary rolled down his window and asked the attendant to repeat himself. "PUT YOUR CAR INTO NEUTRAL!!!!" the attendee screamed.
Zach acted quick and realized that having his car in park was probably causing damage to it at this point. Then he realized that the "ride" had begun and he started to roll up his window. It must have dawned on him at exactly that moment that he was in my car, and the driver’s side window most often gets stuck when it is rolled down. I can only imagine (with delight) what happened next. Zach proceeded to be washed, waxed, and whomped in the head with the car wash "whompers," all the while panicking and possibly screaming as he was pummeled, soaped, and squirted. He denies any screaming, or obscenities, but I like to imagine that there was much of that going on.
When he exited the car wash, another 'annoying' manikin was holding a sign that said to go when the light came on. Zach waited patiently. He was not going to make any move without being sure he was doing the right thing. He was mortified when (probably about 5 min later) he was forced to make a move as the car behind him started honking with fervor.I asked Zach "when did you finally get the window up," and he replied with bitterness, "about 10 blocks later."It is 20 degrees outside, he was wet, and he had to drive 10 blocks with the window down. Also, Chloe was with him in the car at the time (though... thankfully, she remained dry... and possibly slept through the entire adventure). Zach was late to work this afternoon because he had to wash the stick from his soapy and waxy body, and change his clothes. I know that in time Zach will be able to see the humor in this situation. He begged me not to tell anyone. I apologized and told him that the world MUST know of this.
I hope you enjoy this gift I have given you.
I will try to get some pictures of this car wash in the next week so you all can see how funny it is. All in all I think this was one of the better days I have had in my life.
Monday, February 4, 2008
And on the 8th day... she POOPED!
Chloe has been having issues with constipation, and this just wouldn't be a "mommy blog" if I didn't mention it. Since Chloe started solid foods (well... she had cereal at Christmas, but real "1st foods" after the 9th of January), she has not been regular. It was a concern when she was going 4 days at a time without pooping, and the doctors office recommended we give her a suppository (that is if rectal stimulation, a sitz bath, and prune juice didn't work... I know LOVELY).
Well, she went 4 days without pooping, and then we got her to poop by sticking the ole thermometer up her bum. 4 days later she pooped on her own. Then she went 4 days more and the thermometer didn't work, so we bought a suppository and gave it to her. 4 days after that she did not poop, and we decided that suppositories were not the best (can be habit forming).
We waited and called the doctor on day 5. We were told to call after day 7 if still no poopies. On day 8 (today) we went to the doctor's office. The doctor felt Chloe's tummy for hard lumps- and there were none. She told us to give Chloe 5ml dark Karo syrup 2 times a day, 1 oz pear juice 2 times a day, and if that didn't work (after 2 days) we should try Miralax (a very tiny dose).
WELL, after shopping and getting all the ingredients to make her poop (being stopped by literally every person in the store to just gush over how cute Chloe is), we went home and fed her 5 ml (1tsp) dark Karo syrup through a syringe. We tried to get her to drink pear juice... but alas she will not take a bottle. After this I let her nurse, and HOORAY!! There was a massive explosion. She finally pooped! A big orange brown stinky mess, all over her cute little outfit. It was awful and wonderful. Daddy made a lot of overly dramatic gagging sounds and gasps and exclamations. She was sticky from the Karo syrup, and I was not confidant she was all clean from the poopin, so we had to take her to the sink after we had cleaned her all up with a baby wipe.
Now she is laying in her bed (clean and in a new outfit) because she looked sleepy... but she is just giggling and playing in there! Squealing in delight and kicking those legs. What a cutie. I can tell she is very happy to have finally emptied those tiny bowels.
Sunday, February 3, 2008
So PRETTY!
Today at church, Chloe was a big distraction. She had her fuzzy snow boots and tights on, with a green dress and her 
white lacy sweater. The icing on the cake was her green headband with the big pink bow and flower on it that we put on the top of her head. I noticed that a whole section of people was NOT listening to the lesson at all. Chloe was just too cute!
white lacy sweater. The icing on the cake was her green headband with the big pink bow and flower on it that we put on the top of her head. I noticed that a whole section of people was NOT listening to the lesson at all. Chloe was just too cute!
She is so much fun!!!
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